I shudder at the thought of having to type a few words these days.
The high point of this whole quarter's writing has been an official mail I composed late yesterday night. That is when I realized my writing has gone from manageable to garbage-disposable. In a paragraph of six sentences, I must have used the word 'Just' just sixteen times which was okay until I realised that I used 'Basically' twice in a seven word sentence. So basically, it was a wake up call in the midst of sleep-reading the crap I had written. (Wait. Did I do that again?) It made me realise what I was missing. The frantic finger-hops on the keyboard, the hurried reading, the publishing and republishing of the blog just because of twenty spelling errors, thirty unnecessary commas and countless omissions of prepositions and conjunctions. The crazy cycle has been missed.
Its not like I was not trying. I did. I swear. I have at least five unpublished drafts. Okay, I agree two of them are blank, and one of them is akin to a digital signal. But still, I tried. I even published a few spam comments, so that I'd be inspired by their relentless encouragement. There was one that said, "Hey I loved your informative post. I was wondering if you'd like to buy bathroom accessories since your writing clearly reflects the lack of their existence in your life". Now, I do admit I sometimes skip a bath or two over the weekends but humiliating me publicly, it was just too unbearable. I had to do some snooping and before you go jumping all over the place pinching your nose, let me tell clarify this was under a post I had written eliciting the finer nuances of 'Jab Tak Hai Jaan' and I had put up a Shahrukh Khan image. ( Even I didn't know about his bathing habits till then, Shocking, isn't it? ) Now do you know why the comment sprung up? I think that ought to put you in your place. So anyway, there was not much enthusiasm forthcoming due to such insanely relevant comments. I didn't know what to do, I still don't.
Then I thought that maybe this is what they call 'A Writer's Block', and I'd read for a while, but between stealing temple junk and running away from vampire-like monsters, I couldn't spare much time. I didn't even read the newspaper. I neither knew that there was a massive flood that happened in Bangladesh, nor about the Maoist attack on some politicians. Now don't start brandishing me if I know that Srinivasan guy is not quitting BCCI. Its just that I get Times Of India at home. You see it screams out all the news that's worthy of being made into a Bollywood movie in the near future while holding back all the other unwanted stuff. It screams, trust me, and there's also some shrill cat-weeping like background music that accompanies it. It seems they are following what is called a 'Ram Gopal Varma' news model. Anyway, it is unrelated to my writing which was what I was writing about.
This not-writing thing. It is really driving me crazy. I do shudder at the thought of typing a few words these days. Or maybe it is just the AC. Who knows?