Running Late - The only kind of running I'm good at

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So I thought I could run. I mean not run away from all the work that I have. I can do that. I'm doing it right now. But I actually thought I could run. So when there was a 5k marathon, and people all around the place were registering for it, I thought why not? I started practicing three months early, I downloaded Runkeeper,  I strolled on the treadmill, I frolicked in Lalbagh. I mean I really tried hard. I even bought a pair of running shorts.

It all started one crazy day when I had too much on my plate and whatever people said to me was going over the head. Does it happen to you? I think so. I can understand the mindset of people who read my posts. We are all the same. Confused, bored to death, and having attention deficit disorders. So anyway, where was I? Yeah, crazy day. So on this crazy day, somebody says to me. Hey..there's a 5K marathon..Everyone's going. Why don't you come? I do this thing where I involuntarily nod when I am not listening and people keep talking. I did just that. OVER! It was too late. My name was registered. And then bam! I couldn't do nothing about it. So I thought I'd practice. That's when I downloaded Runkeeper. You should download it too. It's a good app. I mean if you actually run. If you are like me, it just drains out your battery and you don't realise until you are stuck in the rain and can't call anyone to come pick you up. Yeah, this is what I went through.

Anyway I did all I could. I put all my heart into practicing. Heart, yes. Head, yes. Legs, No. Big Bum. Hell no. But still, I tried. I ran at a pace that would put any Kenyan to shame. I mean, fat kenyans. I told myself, I'm only like seven times slower than Usain Bolt. That's a good thing right?

The fateful day arrived and my name was called. Not my name exactly, they just blew the whistle. I
exaggerate things, so bear with me. With my head and butt in two opposite trajectories, I started running. My slightly overweight friend(I'm being polite here) with whom I had made an agreement to walk with me started running. Backstabbed! Still, I held my head high. Everyone overtook me. I was not disappointed. I was thinking of the hare and tortoise story. Didn't we learn Slow and steady wins the race? Apparently not.

So I ran. I ran like the wind. There was no wind. I ran and I ran, and I was breathless. I was tired. I was close to a heartburn. And yet, I didn't give up. I had read about runner's spirit somewhere. Is this what it is, I thought. I was glad. I was ecstatic. My whole body was pleading me to give up, but my mind said otherwise.  I turned around like Milkha did in Olympics to see where I was. And there I was, a measly hundred metre away from the line. I couldn't give up now. I was only 4900 metres away. That's when I realised. I said to myself. It was enlightenment. I told myself. Fuck the rest. I am going to walk.

And then it was glorious. I walked in the 5K run which seemed like a marathon to me

Only two people behind me.

One asthmatic aunty. Whoever said diseases are bad for one's morale. She sure boosted mine.
Another babe in a velvet jacket. Thank god for the jacket, she kept me company.

That's when I decided that running 'late' for things is the only running I'm good at.

Photo credits: http://www.ithoughttheysaidrum.com/category/training/

3 comments:

  1. Your opinion on your readers stands out from the crowd. Not because it's unique or anything, but because you mention it nonchalantly, in the guise of writing humor. But still, you do have readers, even after all these months of unapologetic silence. I think it's got to do more with your cat. Didn't he run the marathon? I guess not, because I read there were only two people who finished after you :P

    Destination Infinity

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  2. Hi Destination,

    Its really amazing that you still follow my blog. Thank you :) I haven't been writing nowadays for a variety of reasons, probably I'll blog about it. :)


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  3. Hey stumbled down here after a long long time.. Great post to read as always.. 😊

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