She looked in the mirror. The world seemed okay. Her gym workouts were showing results. Her butt seemed smaller than two weeks ago when she wore the same jeans, panicked and joined the gym the very next day. She had a butt fixation which bordered on OCD.
‘It’s looking good, You look smokin’ hot’
‘Yeah right, thunder thighs, that name was coined just for you’
‘Shut your mouth, Big butts are in. Haven’t you seen Beyonce shake her booty?’
She was getting ready to go to Brigade road to catch a movie at Rex, the dilapidated theatre and go out for a couple of drinks later with her gal pal. She was just getting over her boyfriend and it was a little hard. They tried to make it work but it was just not working. She always smirked when she read in the papers that so and so broke off their relationships due to irreconcilable differences but now she knew that it was so true.
‘I miss him, I love him’
‘Fucking bastard’
‘I wanna hold his hand again, I wanna smell him again’
‘Get a life! He was one royal “arsehole”, All I miss is his Sachin Tendulkar-ish voice, Woh! That never failed to crack me up’
She tried not to focus on the idiot and concentrate at the choice of tops in front of her. It had to be red, her favourite color. She had red tops in all shapes, and it was hard to make up her mind. Finally, she chose a sleeveless top and pulled on her sweater on top, Bangalore was getting chilly.
“Look at my butt”, She told her mom.
“It looks fine”, Mom said without breaking her concentration on the onions she was chopping.
“Look at it, now”, She demanded.
“Okay, Yeah its reduced”, Mom said even though she couldn’t make out any change. She never understood this obsession, better this than alcohol or drugs, she shuddered remembering the scary article she'd read in the Times about teens.
”Which movie are you going to?”
“Ah, some flop movie, Pooja wants to watch that Anjaana Anjaani. I hate that Ranbeer Kapoor. What to do? I’ll just go and eat caramel popcorn”
‘Caramel popcorn, yummmm'
‘Thats the only thing left, why don’t you have lunch at pizza hut and dessert at corner house too’
‘Double yummm’
‘I was trying to be sarcastic’
“Why can’t you stay home atleast one weekend, always you’ll be roaming about”, She snapped out of the reverie hearing her mom’s voice.
She rolled her eyes and took her purse.
“Okay mom, gotta get going B’bye”
She went to the garage, blew the dust off her scooty and tried to start it. It wouldn’t budge.’Damn, this cold start’. She tried to imitate her uncle as she lowered her scooty to the side.
‘This should do the trick’
She pressed the self start button, slowly it whimpered to a start and gradually she accelerated till it started roaring. She smiled and put her purse in the dickey.
She started and pushed herself off into the street. This was her zone. She’d heard that some people got great ideas when they were on the pot. This was her equivalent. There was something about riding that exhilarated her, the wind blowing in her face, the calm roads on a weekend afternoon, it excited her. She thought about the pub she was going to in the night, her friend had raved about it, and though most of the times her opinion was unreliable, today she thought she’d give it a go.
‘Too bad, you can’t booze tonight’
‘Wtf, why?’
‘Because, you’ve gotta drive back home an d Pooja cant ride for nuts’
‘Shit! then why the hell are you dragging me to a pub, you sadist?’
‘Hehehehehe’
She veered towards the south end signal, the timer said “100” seconds to go.
She yawned and turned towards her left. The guy in the next car looked surprisingly similar to her TL. She squinted at him to get a clearer look and which point he turned towards her and made a strange face. She turned away.
‘Thank god, it’s not him’
‘Ooooh I thought you had the hots for him’
‘That was before he opened that stinkin shithole of his, he’s one SOB, besides he's married’
‘Careful now, you are crossing the line, that is my territory’
‘You are right, handling one bitch is hard enough’
She had to make some major changes, quit her company, maybe.
‘I’ve gotta start building a concrete plan. I have to do something else. I cannot bloody work for some fucking ass hole.’
‘Yakkity yak yak, Yakkity Yak Yak
‘Wipe that fuckin smirk of your face or you’ll have it’
‘Blah Blah Blah Blah Blaaaaaaaaaaaaah’
She turned about the VV Puram circle and proceeded towards JC road. She passed NMH on her left side and thought about all the mornings she used to come there as a child with her dad, just to eat Idli Sambar.
‘Ahh, those were the days’
‘I hate to say this but I agree with you’
She came to a stop at the Minerva junction and looked around. All was familiar; all was Bangalore, her favourite city.
The signal turned green. She quick-started her scooty. There was a lot of commotion on JC Road, some baaraat was passing in the middle of the afternoon. The M word was taboo for her.
‘Shit, soon its going to be my turn. And there’s going to be a Oh-so-heavenly husband, some pious mom-in-law and Baghban-type FIL, and then peeing and pooping kids. ‘
‘I’m going to have a sexy fling on the side’
‘Yeah, in your dreams’
‘You just wait and watch’
She started humming some song that came to her mind. She passed the Unity building and came to another stop.
‘Another 10 minutes. I’d better message that damn Pooja’
‘You messaged her before you left home right?’
‘There’s no reply’
“Ill b der in 10 min. Wru?” she typed.
‘A goddamn fool, that’s what she’s, always hanging out with that oaf’
‘Why do you have to be such a cynic?’
‘Oh you Ms.Goody-two-shoes boring nerd, If not for me, your life would’ve been worse than a two paisa nun’s’
She was now passing cubbon park. She remembered how she used to go on the toy train when she was a kid.
‘“One day, I’ll get my kids here’
‘Red Alert! KIDS!! Wtf, one step at a time, for god’s sake kids like you can’t have any kids’
She crossed the signal and took a right to park in church street. She bargained with the attendant and paid him ten bucks.
Her phone started ringing. It was Pooja.
“What the hell Richa, I have booked tickets for tomorrow, not today!”
“Shut up! You messaged me specifically saying it’s today, 17th!”
“Yeah 17th, today is 16th!”
“Oh fuck fuck fuck fuck!”
She cut the call in exasperation.
‘Its all your fault, can’t you read the message properly?’
‘Why can’t you? Always passing the buck’
An auto-driver was leaning on his sole possession. Business was slow, He was reading Prajavani and having a cup of coffee. Suddenly he saw a girl scream on top of her voice.
“Shut the fuck up, both you bitches!!, enough is enough!”
Strange, these rich kids are, he thought to himself.
You wouldn't (not for long anyway!) witter on just about yourself without encouraging input and comment from another while your sat at pub or coffee house..
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