College Crazies or Office Loonies

36 comments
"Aaah college life was the best"

I hear this sentence every single day in office. But when we were in college, all I used to hear was, "I can't wait to start working. You see how I'll blow my bloody money". Idiots, we were all!

But whatever it is, idiots like us make college fun.

Like every other class, mine too had a share of geeks, losers, wannabes and psycho people . Many times in the past, I have wondered if god had handpicked all the idiots and put them in one class. Mine.

It may be true. The realisation happened one extremely hot afternoon in the first semester itself. The fan was not working even after decorating the regulator with ten pieces of paper, which usually took only two or three pieces. So one boy, Shaktimaan tried to swing the fan by standing on the desk. You may think that Shaktimaan was trying to help people by doing this great deed, let me tell you that this boy kept doing it in every class for the next two days even though by one trial it was pretty sure that the fan would never work.

Shaktimaan was not alone. My class had lots of such specimens. There was one boy, who always used to wear a blue shirt with huge yellow flames whenever a college function happened. Every single time, blue shirt with flames. He had a very strange vocabulary too. He introduced me to words that I would never ever conceive could be possible in an Indian language. Till date I don't know what language he spoke in, maybe some long lost pygmy language. I'll give you some examples if you don't believe me. His typical sentence went like this,

"Dude what Mach this aayakudhi volavol"

I seriously don't know what aayakudhi and volavol mean, but this guy used it in every damn sentence. One vivid thing I remember about him is, how he unabashedly sang Avril Lavigne's "Complicated" in the same pygmy accent to a bewildered class during our trip. Scary, it was.

Then, there was another girl. My favorite.The only words that'd ever come out of her mouth were, "Its okay". Whatever you say, she says "Its okay", doesn't matter if its a question, answer or statement or an obituary or whatever. She once took my friend walking to another bus stop 1 km away just by saying those two magic words. How?

IO girl: "Devu, come with me to City Market stop"

Devu: "No, I get my bus from here"

IO girl: "Its okay. Come"

Devu: "No, I wont"

IO girl: "No its okay, come!"

And the cycle went on till my friend started believing it was logical to walk one km and then take a bus, she was hypnotised.  It seems that girl has managed to get a guy to fall in love with her. Lets not try and guess the strategy used.

Then there was A. He thought he was the dude of our class. Though coming from his mouth, it sounded more like "Dyude" and he used to do the most atrocious things. He once wrote a love letter to a junior. He asked me to proof read it for him. This is how it started,

"Hi da, I love you da
If you don't love me da, I think I will die da"

For people populating above India's midriff, "Da" is a common South Indian way to greet anyone from your extended family to your prospective family, albeit of the same age group. Don't go and call your future FIL, "Ennada Sollada Koli motte thinnada", You may get kicked in the shins.

By the time I got to the end of the letter which spanned around three pages, I was overdosed da and I didn't know what to tell him da and the girl rejected his proposal da, and he still cries about it da.

I was no better. I thought people who had a habit, any kind of habit, smoking, drinking or whatever were cool. So I thought of a more harmless habit, chewing gum. I used to chew gum all the time, thinking I'm some super cool rowdy girl of my class. My lecturer used to yell at me and make me spit it out every day. I hate gum. I don't know why I used to do it. Mad, I was.

All of us, when we enter the corporate world, we take a rebirth. We turn into formal wearing, shoe-polishing, tie wearing, meeting attending bloody bootlickers!

Aaah college life was the best!

36 comments:

  1. hehe :P other side looks GREENER..
    When i was in school, i wanna attend college and enjoy and in college i miss my school days and want to work and enjoy :D

    funny read... what kind you belong to ? psycho ? nerd ? wannabe ? :P :D

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  2. I don't know about the corporate world...long way to go before I'll experience it...but still I'd say college life is the best... :) :D

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    1. Yes, yes..stretch your college life as much as possible, else you'll cry!

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  3. My college was an Army regiment; the lesser said the better. Hence you will never see me make the cardinal sin of putting 'college life' and 'best' in the same sentence.

    The Shaktiman of our class did the same thing with the fan, only he pulled down the fan and came crashing with it breaking his hip in the process #EpicFail

    ha Ha.Nice one.

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  4. Haha..Shaktimaan, IO girl, Dyude A...nice names
    My college hasn't ended yet so I wouldn't be able to connect but here I manage to see people who say school life was the best!! :P
    I think these cries never end. ;)

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    Replies
    1. Thats true..i think if i ever quit my job, i may end up crying for it :D

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  5. Good One Da..
    Every class has such specimens Da. Maybe one day da I will also classify them da.

    Curse you for giving me this da infection Da!!!

    Cheers,
    Shrijeet

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  6. Hahahaha! Another awesome post Ana jhi :D ;).
    I'm yet to attend college :D. Can't wait for it ;).
    But, I love my school :D. Aah! Memorable days <3 :D ;).
    All idiots in your class? o.O
    Guess ALL of them have little siblings who are in MY class :P :P.

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    Replies
    1. Be careful about what u wish for, what if the siblings actually end up in ur class :P

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  7. LOL! I was simply laughing all through your post! Awesome awesome post I should say! :D Even I've been asked to spit gum so many times out of class.I am still a gum addict,taking into consideration I'm still in college!! :D

    And the da guy,even I get sick with people indulging in the overload of da and ma and pa when they end their well spoken fluent English sentences :P

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  8. As always a damn funny read! :D
    We all experience such specimens in all our classes, but I can't express them as funny and delightful as you do. :)

    But definitely I agree, college life is the best! Nothing like it. :)

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  9. college life rocks .. even i had few specimens in my class and each one of us felt the same for other... including myself !!!

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  10. Loved this post. I felt this way after spending nearly 20 years among office loonies, and whenever our group of friends from our younger days connected, we were all saying the same thing. Today, many of us, myself included have opted out of that life. It has meant letting go of a lifestyle based on insecurity and greed, of choosing between a need based lifestyle and one driven by consumption and endless want, but we have been able to free ourselves to follow our heart, to do what we always wanted to do. I can see that our post will probably trigger this line of thinking in many people. I think the madness and the fever of conviction that our lives meant something that we experienced in college is lost as we start working for corporates. At the cost of sustenance, we devote ourselves to deliberate and open profiteering. Sympathy and regrets are no substitute for action. You will be amazed at the support systems waiting for people to take the plunge and turn their backs on meaningless lives!

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    1. Wow! Its always feels nice to know people who've had the guts to follow their hearts..I am waiting for a push,always I end up feeling insecure about the future..One final push, is what I am waiting for :)..

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  11. Once, in college, I faked an injury and wrapped my wrist with bandage. Beat that >:<

    Such attention seeker I was.

    and

    still am :D

    College days. Sigh. When I loved bryan adams and didn't care what others thought about him.

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    1. I love bryan adams too :)..high five for attention seekers! :D

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  12. grass is always greener on the other side ..

    But I must say I have had a fantabulous college time , I have enjoyed each day of it and AT work tooo I am having os much fun .. god has been so kind ot me ..

    I ma sure you have read the posts at my blog about my college times I have had a blast .. in college.

    Loved the post reminded me all those people who made me laugh and smile and enjoy those times .. Now I am missing them for they are all back home in india and i am left here alone in uk :(


    Bikram's

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    1. Yes, I have read ur posts and you definitely have had crazier times than me :)

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  13. Will I sound odd if I say, I hated college life! Never felt so lonely and it changed me as a person.

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    1. I felt that way in school..some people like school, some college and some work..so you dont sound odd :)

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  15. Aaah! College life was truly the best. :D Most of the time it was about friends and blabbing with them for no reason! And my class too had its share of specimens. :):)

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  16. When I came to work, we were allowed to wear T-shirts on fridays/saturdays (if not going out). We thought, what freedom we have here, when compared to college! :) You people deserve even more disciplining in workplaces. I think somebody should make you meditate for half an hour :)

    Destination Infinity

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  17. haha....Even I was a gum addict. Anyone asked me to spit it, I would offer them one :D So no spitting! And about shaktimaan, anyone of us would stand on the bench and try to move it with a pen and it would get started! Your new follower:)

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  18. Nice memories. I think now he hates 'Da' :)

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  19. @Harsha- Everyone of us is a specimen :)

    @DI- Meditate? We'll sleep :D

    @CD- Thanks! welcome to my blog!

    @Raja- Maybe :D

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  20. Lovely write-up...seems like each class gets similar kind of specimens...am sure some of my stories would match yours...:-)

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  21. Hhehehe Why am I not following this blog? :D
    I am now!
    Btw the guy who tried getting the fan to spin believed in "NEVER GIVE UP" or "MIRACLES HAPPEN" :P
    and I know a guy like the blue and flamed tshirt one :P
    and IO girl...hehehehehehe I laughed soooo much!

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  22. @Suchi- Yes, yes..everyone has their own stories :)

    @Red handed- Welcome to my blog!

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